


Loving the Same

by allixiler



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:33:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29588676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allixiler/pseuds/allixiler
Summary: You can't ever be Lily...but he doesn't want you to be.
Relationships: Severus Snape & Reader, Severus Snape & You, Severus Snape/You
Kudos: 6





	Loving the Same

The room was quiet, the only occasional sounds came from Severus as he turned the page of his book every few moments or so. You laid quietly against his chest as his arm was hooked around you so his hand could hold his chosen reading for the evening. His dark hair was rather unkempt as it rested on his head and softly on his shoulders. 

Both of you were nestled into the soft mattress, wrapped up in the dark sheets and enjoying each other’s company. While the room was comfortable, your mind was hard at work. 

You had been rather preoccupied the last several days. Your mind had been racing and the wheels in your head had been turning. You loved Severus. You loved him dearly. You adored every inch of him. He was cold and stoic more often than not, but he had a special soft spot for you. 

You knew that he loved you. He would never deny it. The way he stroked your skins every morning to wake you up, the way he looked into your eyes when you were close to him. He always showed you that he loved you, but he never told you that he loved you.

He was very much a physical touch/acts of service kind of guy when it came to showing his love. You loved that about him, but sometimes you felt that you needed to hear him say it. The lack of verbal confirmation sometimes left you to interpret how he really felt. The interpretation would lead to insecurity. The insecurity always led to doubt. 

And the doubt always led to Lily. 

You knew all about Lily. Over time, Severus felt that he trusted you enough to tell you about Lily and what she meant to him. Lily was Severus’ first love, his first disappointment, and his first real heartbreak. Severus had already been a bit of a dark person, a lost soul. You wondered if losing Lily had permanently hindered him.

He loved Lily. She was his first friend. He wanted her and he cared about her. He wanted to spend every moment of every day of his life with her. He wanted to marry her, have children with her, and love her until one of them was in the ground. Her death affected him greatly. He would always love her. 

Would he ever love you the way he loved her?

You lazily dragged your fingertips along his arm, scratching lightly and gently. He could tell that you were thinking about something serious. He had noticed that you had been rather distant from him over the last couple of days. He caught you staring off into space more than once, a glazed look in your eyes as you mercilessly overworked yourself and used all your brainpower. 

“Would you care to share what you’re thinking?” Severus asked, obviously knowing you were lost in thought again.

Severus was an avid user of the practice of Legilimency. He had become extremely skilled at reading the minds of other people over the years. However, he respected your boundaries and never intruded if he wasn’t asked to. 

“I’m just thinking about you.” You told him truthfully.

That surely got his attention. He removed his arm from around you, closing his book, and setting it aside to give you his full focus. He shifted to where he was sitting up a little straighter, looking down at your cozy frame and looking into your beautiful eyes that he loved so much.

“Is that so?” He asked; “May I ask what about me has you so occupied?”

You looked away from him. You didn’t want to lie. He’d be able to see right through you. He patiently waited, stroking your head as you mustered up the courage to speak.

“I’m sorry…I can’t ever be her.” You said quietly,

Severus raised a brow.

“Her?”

You took a breath.

“I can’t be her, Severus. I can’t be Lily.” 

Severus’ heart fluttered, his blood going cold for a moment. He felt a twinge of guilt arise in his chest. Had he caused you to compare yourself to Lily? You were completely different people. You had your own personalities, way of thinking, and lifestyle. He never wanted you to draw similarities from Lily.

“[Y/N]…” He said at almost a whisper. He moved your head to where you were looking at him again. “I would never want you to be like her. I want you to be yourself.”

You shook your head, realizing that he didn’t understand what you were saying. His brows furrowed in confusion and concern at your sudden confession.

“That’s not what I mean. I’m saying that…” You trailed off for a moment before finishing your thought; “I can’t ever be what she was to you.”

His expression softened, his heart aching that you felt this way.

“Darling, don’t you know what you mean to me?” He questioned, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs; “I did love her. I won’t deny it. But I love you just as much. You’re positively the love of my life. I do love you,”

You felt a heat creep onto your cheeks. You felt a sense of warmth and relief flood through your whole body. You fluttered your lashes as you looked at him, something that drove him absolutely wild. He kissed your head, and in that moment you were fully assured that he did love you. Maybe you weren’t Lily, but you were yourself. 

That’s all he could ever want.

A million thoughts went through your head. You remembered the moment you loved him. You remembered your first real date and how he was so nervous he could barely sit still. You wanted to remember every moment with him.

“I love you,” He spoke in his deep, silky voice. 

He kissed you once more before adding on one final thought before the two of you turned in for the night.

“Always.”


End file.
